


The One With the Duck

by Drownedinlight



Category: Leverage
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-13
Packaged: 2018-10-03 19:51:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10256468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drownedinlight/pseuds/Drownedinlight
Summary: Parker wants to go to the grocery store...to feed a duck? Eliot and Hardison, as usual, are just along for the ride.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [acedott](https://archiveofourown.org/users/acedott/gifts).



> acedott generously agreed to donate $20 to the [Care and Share Food Bank](https://careandshare.org/) in exchange for a fluffy fic with ace Parker and aromantic Eliot. This is what I came up with.

Parker is in a flurry around their office space, but Parker is always and forever on the move, so Alec didn't think too much of it. Not until she says, "Hey, Hardison, where are the keys to Lucille?"

That got his attention quick, fast, and in a hurry. "What do you need the keys to Lucille for?" he asks.

"I want to go grocery shopping," says Parker, nodding at him as if this made perfect sense. "So I need space for the groceries."

Alec blinks, wondering if this Parker is a mirage he dreamed up from drinking too much orange soda. "Park—Parker, why do you want to go grocery shopping?"

"I need the stuff that you can get at the grocery store," says Parker with a shrug.

"You mean food?" Alec asks.

"Yeah, that."

Alec decides in that moment that this is probably going to be one of those situations where Parker will get what she wants. Especially given that she is the best thief out of the three of them. Hiding the keys wouldn't work. Neither would trying to explain why this sounds like sort of a bad plan. So there were two things Alec could do to mitigate the impending disaster. One: Drive Parker himself. Two: "ELIOT!"

"What?" Eliot all but growls as he spoke as he came into the office space from the kitchen.

"Parker wants to go grocery shopping, come on," says Alec.

Eliot blinks at them both, as if he is trying to dispel the Alec/Parker mirage causes from getting punched, cooking too much, or maybe not enough sleep (or maybe all three). After he has a minute to blink, Eliot pulls off his apron and says, "Let's go."

Parker is all smiles. "Oh, this is great! We never get to do stuff together with the three of us."

Parker hums and practically skips out to Lucille. Eliot walks around to the driver's side of the van and Alec tosses him the keys. Parker takes up residence in the back of the van, while Alec takes shotgun.

"Which grocery store are we going to?" Alec asks, fiddling with the GPS.

Eliot smacks his hand away. "Would you stop that? We've lived in Portland for five years now. I know where I'm going. Which one Parker?"

"The one with the duck," says Parker.

Alec can see it on Eliot's face—the expression that is a cross between not trying to punch something and trying not to shout and trying not to laugh.

"Parker, what do you mean the one with the duck?" Eliot asks. "You mean like you can buy duck there?"

"Or there's a duck on the logo?" Alec asks. He already had his phone out and is googling "Portland, groceries, duck."

"No, there's a grocery store with a duck," says Parker. "He lives there, ever since his Mama laid him as an egg. They didn't have the heart to kick him out."

Alec and Eliot were both quiet as they digest this information. After a moment, Alec asks, "Does...does the duck have a name?"

Parker nods emphatically, a smile lighting up her whole face. "His name's George Henry Philippe III."

"Where did they get the first two George Henry Philippes?" Eliot asks, shaking his head. He turns the keys in the ignition. "Wait, I don't want to know. Parker, do you know how to give directions to this store?"

"Sure," says Parker, as she leans forward to rest her chin on the shoulder of Eliot's chair.

 

Fifteen minutes later they were at a farmer's market.

Actually, Parker had been giving directions and then in front of a local park where they were holding a farmer's market says, "Oh wait, stop here." And, well, Alec had never known Eliot to pass up a chance at a farmer's market.

"I mean I guess this sort of makes sense," says Alec as he and Eliot climbs out of Lucille. Parker had already bounds ahead of them. "Duck's live in parks."

"But this ain't a grocery store, man," says Eliot, a grimace wound tight on his mouth. Then he stops in front of a stand of Portobello mushrooms, the frown melting off his face. "You managed to grow these here?"

"Yep!" says the stall owner. "We have a special growing house to keep them at the right temperature."

Alec rolls his eyes as Eliot and the stall owner fell into deep conversation about the intricacies of growing mushrooms. He waits a minute out of respect for his friend and then went to go find Parker.

Naturally, Alec found her at a climbing wall, dramatically racing a four-year-old to the top—Parker only made it after the four-year-old beat her. "Oh good job!" says Parker giving her a high-five.

"Careful, babe," he calls to her. "We can't take one home just yet. Eliot would get mad."

"Spoilsport!" Parker calls back.

"Is that your wife?" asks a hovering mother.

"Girlfriend," says Alec. "Six years now. Enjoying every minute."

"She seems to really like kids," says one of the other mothers. "Are you guys thinking of adopting?"

"Been thinking about it for a while," says Alec. And they had. They weren't planning on being in the game forever, but it did sort of dominate their lives right now. But kids had been on and off his mind since Parker had confessed to him one night as they were falling asleep that she did want kids. If Alec wanted them, too, of course. Alec had leaned over and kissed her nose and says, "Of course, babe." And they both wanted to foster and adopt, since they had variations on the experiences when they were younger.

"That's sweet," says one of the others.

Alec's eye drew to where Parker is helping a little boy climb to the top of the five foot wall and shouts with joy, "Miss Parker I made it!"

"Hey, that's where I know you guys, you run that brew pub," says one of the mothers beaming at him. "With the climbing wall—you have kids climb free night every second and fourth Thursday."

"Yeah!" says Alec. "Hold on, I have vouchers." He is nearly finished handing out the free family meal vouchers when Eliot came up behind him with three canvas bags full of vegetables, cheeses and some butchered meat. "Man, I left you alone for like five minutes."

Eliot shrugs. "It's a small market." He smiles evenly and nods to the hovering mothers. "Morning, ladies."

All the hovering mothers sigh in appreciation at Eliot's greeting. Everyone sighs with appreciation at Eliot. Alec gets it—Eliot knows how to act normal when Parker and Alec don't care to.

"Parker!" Eliot hollers. "Let's go."

Park looks over at him and grins. The kids around her groan, but once Parker has assure them that they will meet again, she hops off and then bounces her way to where Eliot and Alec are standing.

"Did you see your duck?" Eliot asks.

"Oh, George Henry Philippe III doesn't live here," says Parker blinking at them. "I told you, he lives in a grocery store. I just wanted to climb a little. And Eliot needed fresh air."

Eliot tries to look grumpy, but Alec can tell he's finding it difficult in the face of Parker's thoughtfulness. "Well you're not wrong. Let's go then."

Parker takes one of the bags of produce from Eliot in one hand and Alec 's hand in her other and bounds ahead back to where they left Lucille.

As they go, Alec hears one of the hovering mothers ask if she can give Eliot her number. Alec hears Eliot say something that is a stuttered combination of "thanks but no thanks," and "I'm seeing someone right now."

Parker, bless her, manages to wait until they're all back in Lucille to ask, "Why did you lie to her?"

"What do you mean?" Eliot asks, as he starts the van again and pulls out into traffic.

"You told that woman you were seeing someone," says Parker. "But you're not. Unless we count."

Eliot just looks at her in the rearview mirror, his blue eyes focused and soft. "The two of you count in all the ways that matter. But I can't explain to most folk the way I love in two seconds. It's easier to let them think they were just too late."

"Oh," says Parker. "Like how a lot of people don't understand how I love Alec but I don't want to do sex things with him?"

"Yeah," says Eliot. He's a little grumbly, but not punching levels of grumbly. He reminds Alec of a kitten, almost, when he gets like this. They use their claws to hold on to what they love, and their purrs only sound like thunder when you're close enough to hold them.

"Okay." Parker nods and then taps his shoulder. "Make a left here."

 

They end up stopping at three other grocery stores before they find the one with the duck.

The next time they stop after the farmer's market is Alec’s fault. There's a small corner store that's having a sale on orange soda.

"You are a person not a math problem!" Eliot yells as they load the soda into the back of Lucille.

The third stop is for croutons. Parker buys a single bag that they toast at grocery store. "These are George Henry Philippe III’s favorite. I've tested it."

The fourth stop is because they're all hungry and need to pee—since none of them have eaten since that morning and all they had to drink in the van is orange soda. Eliot won't let them touch the produce from the farmer's market since he needs it for his menu experiments at the brew pub, but there's a store that claims to make fresh sandwiches, so Eliot stops, makes them both go to the bathroom and then they get lunch.

"Parker, tell me that this store isn't much further?" Eliot demands as they climb back in the van.

"It's a couple of blocks," says Parker.

And sure enough, the next time she has them pull over she declares this store to be the one with the duck. Then Parker leaps from Lucille before the van has come to a complete stop and races inside.

Eliot swears, but Alec just shakes his head and follows after.

They catch up in time to see Parker talking with a cashier. Alec can't believe his eyes, but they appear to be hovering by a chicken wire pen with, yes, an actual duck inside. "Oh my God, there's actually a duck," he says. Alec holds up his phone and takes a picture. He attaches it to a message and types out a rapid fire text.

"Who are you texting?" Eliot asks.

"Sophie," says Alec. "She says she doesn't hear from us enough."

Eliot rolls his eyes but says, "Make sure to send it to Nate too, otherwise he'll feel left out."

Alec nods, copying over the text and sending it out to Nate.

Nate texts back asking, "Do you need help?" And Alec isn't quite sure how to take it, quickly answering no.

Sophie says, "Booking tickets to Portland. Can explain duck in supermarket when we get there."

"Nate and Sophie are coming for a visit," says Alec as he looks up from his phone.

Park is feeding George Henry Philippe III the croutons that she bought, sharing the bag with the attendant. She looks over to them and waves them over. Eliot huffs and rolls his eyes, but comes when she calls, and Alec, well, Alec will always go where Parker asks.

So they round off the day by feeding croutons to a duck. Alec, he has to say, has had worse. And when they get home, Eliot makes them dinner and they finish in front of the TV watching a movie. Tomorrow Alec will get wind of a case they need to investigate, but for now they feed the duck, and that is all they need.


End file.
